Why do we feel bad?
and why do we sometimes become unhappy?

This might sound like a general question because, as we all know, many different reasons could make someone unhappy.

However, if you looked more in-depth at bad moods, you will discover that the same mechanism happens exactly whenever someone feels ba,d even if the reason was different.

People feel bad when an event happens that changes their beliefs about their ability to reach their important goals.

You might be telling yourself now that some people don’t have goals at all. I am not talking about the goals people set on the conscious level, but instead, I am talking about unconscious plans.

For example, The girl who loves attention has an unconscious goal of becoming famous. The guy who worries all the time has the cold intent of being in control.

So even if people don’t have conscious goals, they do have unconscious ones that were developed due to their past experiences. When anything makes those people believe that they can’t reach their unconscious goals, they will feel sad immediately.

Unconscious goals, beliefs, and bad moods

There is some good news here; bad events can’t change someone’s mood unless he has certain beliefs. Here is a simple example that explains how thoughts can be the main reason for sadness.

A girl who believes that she has average beauty and firmly believes that she could attract guys if she developed an ideal body will feel sad if anything prevented her from pursuing her perfect body.

Based on these beliefs, this girl became extremely motivated to exercise and to stay fit. 2 weeks before the summer, the girl fell and had to put her legs in a cast.

The girl felt extremely bad, and none of her friends managed to make her feel better.
Do you know why the girl felt that bad? It’s because this event, combined with her beliefs, made her think that she will never reach her important goal (attract a guy).

The mistake people make when trying to make someone feel better is that they keep talking about the event that happened to make it look trivial. In short, people who comfort their friends describe the event from their point of view, forgetting that each person has different goals. As a result, the significance of such events differs significantly from one person to another.

Had this girl been married, she would have still felt bad, but the bad mood would have been much less intense in such a case.

How to Change your Mood in 5 minutes

1. Understand your subconscious goals: If you want to change your mood quickly, you first need to understand your subconscious goals very well. Know precisely which important goal this lousy event is preventing you from reaching
2. Think of a different way to reach this goal: Find out any other possible method to help you achieve that same goal. I know this is not an easy part, but your mood would change in minutes if you managed to do it right.
3. Apply that new method right away: As soon as you come up with that alternate method, start applying it right away, and your mood will improve a great deal